I need some Councilling

  

It's been a while since last visiting my blog.  Life has been busy.

But I wish I had begun a chronological diary a few months ago of my present journey I'm presently on of selling, purchasing and organising everything to do with buying and selling one property to the purchasing of another.

One could wonder what would be interesting in the standard sale and purchase of a home, or homes.  There isn't much really.  It's merely the fact that whenever I, me, do anything there always seems to be some added stories, sojourns or hallucinogenic -type incidences which become either classic humour or elongated dramas that later are latterly looked upon with good humour.

So I thought I'd return to logging some of the many and minor incidences of my personal home relocation journey, to remind me why I hope to never have to do it again.

I shall jump several stories - to go straight to one that has 'bothered' me due to the present Auckland Council by-elections that keep regurgitating my experiences in my short-term memory banks.  There is a prologue, but it is not in this scribe - it may come later.

This story begins only 3 weeks ago.  And it's all about our wonderful AUCKLAND CITY COUNCIL and is one of several illuminating experiences I have recently had with council dealings. 

Whilst I was still living here, at No 8, I had been fortunate to be able to purchase a small brick and tile two-bedroom unit in South Auckland.  Conifer Grove in Takanini.

I had signed a conditional Sale & Purchase Agreement on the conditions that I had a building inspection and obtain a LIM report from our Auckland City Council.  LIM report being a Land Information Memorandum - it is supposed to give one all the information necessary to view before purchasing a property - plans, concerns, features, characteristics, sewerage, drainage ....... you get the picture.

No problem with building inspection, no problem with LIM report, once I had paid the high valued dollars for it.  But is a must.  One wonders how many LIMs are ordered in one week, how many $'s revenue they must create.  But that's of little relevance here.

Building report and LIM OK, the sale went ahead.

The property is nearly forty years old and has had little done to it since the owners had moved in those forty years ago.  I had some weeks before I would be moving from No 8 to this property so it seemed an ideal time to organise a few trades people to tackle some 'minor'  changes and alterations to the property timely enough for me to move in. 

Seemed a reasonable thought. 

First job, move some plumbing.  Second job - prior to the plumber being able to come and assess the job I was informed by both advisors and plumber that I would require a drainage plan which, if not in the LIM report I already had purchased from Council, would be held in the Council.

No, there was no drainage report or plan on the LIM report, so I thought a quick telephone call to Council will, or could, have one obtained and emailed through to me.

Seems a reasonable thought.

Of course, one realises Council is a big place, a big office, with lots of big wigs, and little ones.  So it would be a small matter of one phone call with the anticipation of having a bucket load of patience whilst navigating the answering system that Council provides .....  "Press 1 if you are seeking to pay your rates.  Press 2 if you have a  .....  Press 3 if you require  ...."  

Then " Press 246 if you require an operator to speak to."

I pressed button number 246.

"Welcome to Auckland Council, you are speaking with Jean."

 

Hello Jean, says I, as I note down her name as experience has taught me, always note down the names of anyone you talk to about any matter relating to yourself - you may need that name reference in future, especially if they stuff things up, which would never happen here, but I noted her name anyway.  "I have recently purchased a new property in South Auckland and to enable a plumber to do any plumbing renovations am required to obtain a drainage plan for my property.  Can you assist me with this?"

"I am certain I can," says Jean.  "But sometimes they are on a LIM report, would you like to obtain a LIM report?"  

"No," says I, "I have already paid for and received a LIM report but there is nothing about drainage on it."

"Well you would need to come into a Council office to obtain a drainage plan."

"Can I not have the drainage plan emailed to me,"  I ask..

"No, you need to attend a Council office physically and they will do it for you there.  There will be a small charge for the copying of the report for you." 

"Why do I have to physically go in? OK, I understand the small charge, I just thought you or someone there would be able to access the file for the address and be able to email it through, I could easily pay by direct debit or credit card over the phone."

"No, it's Council policy, you actually have to physically go to Council to get such things done, we don't do this over email or the phone."

Oh, I thought.  I can get medical files over email or the phone, buy cars and houses over email or the phone, order passports and marriage certificates by email or on the phone, I can pay my Council fines and rates over email or the phone, I ordered my LIM report over the phone, wonder why Council doesn't have a system whereby one can obtain a mere drainage plan for a little house in South Auckland over email or the phone?

Bother.  That's a trip into the Council offices in town and I've been there, done that a few times before when endeavouring to obtain information relating to the sale of this property.  That was a time consuming, tear jerking (literally) experience when I last went in there so did not have any desire to relive those experiences again.

But, seems there was no option but to pull my britches up and drive that journey into their offices in the central city once more.  Besides, this was all about my new place of residence, be it temporary, so it was up and onward and this request for a mere drainage report was a far more simple and straight forward one that my earlier request had been - the one that had reduced me to tears.

Next morning, it was bright and sunny, fortunately, I drove myself in my Big Van into the Graham Street, central city offices.  After carefully parking in one of only six car park spaces they make available for general public; parking my Big Van in small spaces is not an easy task and for these Council ones the spaces are limited, narrow and at angle parking, making it rather difficult for those of us who drive anything bigger than an old lady's shopping cart.  But I've become very adept at it now and have learnt never to go early morning as that's when all the tradesmen and property developing project managers go, in their enormous Toyota Ranger wagons or flash 4-wheel drive vehicles which literally take up every millimetre of width of their car park and usually extend well beyond the marked length, making squeezing mine past and in any space as a mission on metal conjuring, if indeed there happens to be one available.

I parked Big Van and walked the 27 steps up and into the public reception.  I know the reception well by now and therefore am able to avoid the queue at the general public reception desk and go straight into the reception area where anything building, LIM, property or land reporting or information seeking is done.

There are usually only two reception people there, as there were this day, but not only were both clearly highly involved in deep research investigation with their 'clients'  but there were three other groups of people waiting in line to be assisted before I would be.  And they all were clasping rolls of plans, sketches and files that showed their requests would also be long, involved and time consuming. 

Over to the right of reception are desks with computers which I had previously analysed were used by the general public to be able to access information on property files that could then be researched and then downloaded for printing.

But to get to use one of these PCs one has to get a reception person to key in access for you, so I would have to resign myself to waiting an inordinate amount of time to be able to access, view and find my drainage plan.

Time passed, a good twenty minutes and the queue had not reduced as the two fortunate 'clients', or 'customers' as Council management have instructed anyone in these offices to call us, were clearly going to be a good, long period more - with those and the three other waiting 'clients' in front of me I would need some more patience.  That's the stuff I have so much of...

I had noticed a third Council staff member lurking around the edges and even helping two of those general public using the PCs.  This person looked knowledgeable and informative with those she was speaking to, so when she walked passed I hailed her and said, "I'm just needing to access a drainage plan for my property, am I able to do so on one of those spare PCs you have there?"

"Yes, certainly," she says.  My little computerised-heart jumps a silent "Hurrah". 

"I just need to know the address of your property."

"It's in South Auckland,"  says I.

"South Auckland," says she, "it's in Manukau then is it?."

 

Well, thinks I, Manukau is South Auckland.  "Yes," I respond.  "Does that matter?"

"Well yes," she says, "if it's in Manukau you will have to go to the Manukau offices to get this information, we don't have it in these offices."

"But, I rang your call centre this morning and Jean, the woman I spoke to, told me I had to come into here.  And Manukau is now Auckland City, don't you have all the information for all your city properties accessed here?"

For the unknown, Auckland used to have 4 cities in the Auckland area - in 2010 all cities were amalgamated and the four cities become one city, one council, one mayor, one local body jurisdiction and laws. Manukau once was one city, but it's now just another suburban area of Auckland City.

So therefore my rational that all the city files would be amalgamated and accessible by all Council offices did not seem to be an unreasonable assumption.

"Well, not really, not yet.  All Manukau property files are still out at the old Manukau City offices," the Council employee says.

"But everything is computerised, can you not access the files in the Manukau office from here?" says I.

"Well, I know it seems we should be able to, but no, you have to go to our Manukau office to do that," she responded.

"That's crazy," I said, to deaf ears.  "I find it hard to believe you guys don't have a centralised and linked in system for your properties.  Is it possible you can ring from here and access that file, or that mere drainage plan for me?"

She shrugged. "No, we wouldn't be able to do that I'm afraid."  And shrugged again.

Grrrummppp.

So I returned to my Big Van. And could not get into it due to some overlarge Range Rover having swung into the car park next to my driver's door, it was so wide and had parked so badly that I had to access my driver's seat by entering via the passenger door. Dick!

Then began the long and tedious 50 minute journey from the city offices onto the Southern Motorway and out to the Manukau offices of Auckland Council.  It was mid-day and the mid-day motorway traffic made the 30 minute journey into 50.  Ah well, I had purposely made no other commitments for the afternoon so time was one thing I had plenty of, I thought.  A deep breath, a shrug of the shoulders let me 'let it go' that the very Council who advocates so much for so many future voters, still has not been able to centralise mainstream office information sharing.

Anyone who knows the old Manukau City area well will know the entire area has been a hive of constant change over the past many years.  Roads appear and disappear almost overnight and new, gigantic buildings suddenly appear next to ones that didn't exist last week.

I spent 30 years of my life living in various areas of Manukau so probably know it reasonably well, therefore knew where the old Manukau office building was so was not concerned about my ability to locate it among the monolith-type buildings I knew had recently sprung up on all the new development arounds around it.

Thus I felt most pleased with self when exited the motorway and drove directly to the old Manukau City buildings that are now hugely sign posted as 'Auckland Council'.

Straight to the building, now a car park.  They must surely have similar parks to their city ones, short-term parking for people doing just as I am, seeking information that means they will not be in the offices long and therefore out and gone for their next 'client'  to utilise?

Seems a reasonable thought.  Silly me.

This was not a case of me not wanting to walk a distance to the office, it was a case of me presuming an obvious - that there would be Council car parks available to public.

Wrong.

Another ten minutes was spent, stupidly driving around in circles seeking such, with no successful outcome.  I gave up looking so I drove to the major Westfield shopping centre, parked, and walked the short distance to the main office.

Enter the office to main reception. 

"Hello, can you tell me where or who I see to help me get a drainage report for my property please?"

"Certainly," she says.  "But you are in the wrong building, you have to go to another building a block away.  Just exit this one, look right, cross the road and another block over is a pink building, it is in that."

So   .....  I breathe ... and I walks to the pink building.

There is a counter with a sign over it indicating that I am finally in the right place, with the right reception where they could get for me the right information.

Seems a reasonable thought.

Went to counter. Was a lovely young chap.  "Kia ora,"  says I, for he was Maori and I enjoy that greeting far more than the standard 'Hello'.

  

"Kia ora ma'am, how can I help you?" 

"I am wanting a drainage plan for a property I have just purchased, it is in Conifer Grove."

"I can help you with that," he says, "If you give me the address then take a seat over there I will find the file and you will be able to access all the information on the Property File on one of our computers over there.  So just take a seat and I'll be with you once I find your file."

I take a seat.  I wander my eyes over the office and its people.  Not unlike any other council office one sits in.  Same building decor, same council furniture, same people, same environs, same conversations overheard, let's hope not the same outcome.

Some ten minutes later I had viewed everything the office had to possibly hold my attention any longer when the lovely (he was particularly good looking) man comes over and says, "Sorry to take so long, but for some reason I could not find the files for your address so I had to go and speak to a colleague to ask for help.  And he tells me, we don't hold your files here, that you will have to go to the Papakura offices to access that information."

"What!" says I.  "You're kidding me, aren't you?"

"No," he says, "Conifer Grove is in Takanini and Takanini came under the umbrella of the old Papakura Council so all the property files for Takanini are held there."

"But I've just been to your city Council offices earlier this morning and the lady there told me I had to come here and now you are saying I have to drive to Papakura offices.  This is crazy, surely the council can integrate its system so information is accessible from whatever office you are at."

"Unfortunately not," says he. "I am very sorry and understand how you feel and why, this happens all the time, but I cannot do anything for you today."

As a ratepayer  I am beginning to understand why so many ratepayers get very angry when mayors and councillors have morning teas, lunches,  go on overseas trips, drive in chauffeured or late model council cars - when all this rate payer wanted was a piece of A4 paper with a copy of my drainage plan on it.

I walked the distance back to the shopping mall and my Big Van.  I exited the car park and eventually re-entered the Southern Motorway and headed south on State Highway 1.  

Naturally karma has it that I encountered a major traffic hold up due to extensive motorway 'realignment'; jammed in between giant trucks only inches away from my driver's and passenger door is never a situation enhancing calm and peace and allowing one's anxiety to lesson.  I was very relieved to finally exit the motorway sometime later, almost drove right past my well drained property at Conifer Grove, and endeavouring to practise the calming Yoga mantras I had learnt some years ago eventually had the Big Van pull up outside the AUCKLAND CITY Papakura office.  And bingo!  Available free car parking spaces.

Entered my third Auckland Council office for the day, by now almost mid-afternoon - having traversed some exceptional mileage from my home in Mt Albert earlier in the day, to the central city council buildings, to South Auckland council buildings, now to deeper South Auckland council buildings just to obtain a copy of my drainage plan.

Lovely lady behind counter, but only the one and already in deep conversation with another ratepayer. No problem I thought, I'll take a seat and wait until she has completed her task with my fellow ratepayer. Only there were no seats.  Well there were seats, six of them, but all of the seats were taken up by men who were clearly known to one another and all holding folders and in deep discussion over something to do with the apartment blocks they were working on.

Not one of them stood for this waiting 'client'.  They all saw me standing but continued with their most important conversation as though they were in the boardroom and we public around them should not be there.

I stood, and waited.  And waited.  I tuned out of the Boardroom Meeting beside me and tuned into the discussion with the receptionist and 'client', my fellow ratepayer.

It was someone discussing a drainage plan!

Seems reasonable.

Eventually they finished so I walked up to my third Council person for the day and asked, "I have been sent here by the Manukau office, after being sent there by the Auckland office to obtain a copy of the drainage plan for my property in Conifer Grove in Takanini.  Are you able to help be with this."

"Yes I certainly can," she kindly responded, "give me the address and I will go find the file for you." 

I did, "Take a seat," she said, "I won't be long."

She obviously was not aware of the board meeting going on, as it still was. I stood.

Some five to six minutes passed and by this point in time every minute seemed an hour to me.

She returns, I walk back to the counter.

"I hate to have to tell you this," she says, "but I can't get you that information because the file for your property has been transferred to the Auckland office."

What!!??!!

"Yes, I'm afraid they were transferred to the Auckland office last week and I now don't have access to them."

"I cannot believe what I am hearing!  I went to the Auckland Council office this morning, they sent me to the Manukau office, I went there and they sent me to this office, and now you are telling me to go back to the Auckland office?"

"Yes, I'm so sorry, but there is nothing I can do.  They should have known those files were there and should never have sent you to Manukau in the first place anyway." 

I couldn't give a stuff.

It seems unreasonable to me.

And with that shall end my diatribe....  because the next chapter is just as long ... and that was two weeks ago but I do not wish this to be an encyclopedic volume of Council experiences.  

If you have yet to vote at this present Council by-election - nothing or no one you vote for is going to help this ratepayer, or any ratepayer for that matter, eventually get their hands on a drainage plan.